Look at this expertly cropped crepe myrtle. You might expect to pay $50, $100, or even $1,000 to enjoy a coiffed crepe like this one at your home. But if you act now, we’ll charge you only $7.99! Now, that’s a deal! Grumpy would like to thank eagle-eyed Dianne Battle for spotting this monstrosity at a shopping center in Mandarin, Florida. My guess is that this crepe myrtle is at least 20 years old, but thanks to repeated and cretinous pruning, it’s the size of a fire hydrant and looks like a shaving brush. Maybe tired shoppers used it for a stool and rest their tired tushes while waiting for a ride.
As her reward for sending Grumpy the superb example of capitalism run amok, Dianne wins a dwarf ‘Early Bird’ crepe myrtle that never needs pruning from our Southern Living Plant Collection. Wow! And it’s worth more than $7.99!
Final Winner This Sunday!
Don’t miss Grumpy’s final installment of Crepe Murder 2013 this Sunday. You wonder how crepe murder got started? Let me just say, a leader needs followers.