She’s always been your girl. When the moment is right, you want to respond. But your male dysfunction — that could be a lack of gardening know-how. Fortunately, there’s an answer. A new book by Helen Yoest called Plants with Benefits.
A garden writer and blogger from Raleigh, North Carolina with a Ph.D in Love, Helen has pulled back the curtains on 45 plants — fruits, vegetables, herbs, spices, and more — to reveal the mysterious and tantalizing ways their looks, tastes, aromas, and contents help men and women get their groove on. Some are pretty obvious — think banana, tomato, and avocado. But oats? Fennel? Celery?
Take lavender, for example. According to Helen, Cleopatra doused herself with lavender oil to get a rise out of Marc Antony. And in Tudor times, newlyweds had lavender placed under their bed to rock the night away. A study claims lavender works by increasing blood flow to the nether regions — just like those little, blue pills. “Clearly,” writes Helen, “we should be adding lavender to our pizza, and seasoning popcorn with this herb.”
Lavender popcorn, my sweet? Oh, DO have some more.
Last year, I felt like a rube after forgetting my weights and measures during a visit to the spice market at the world-famous Grand Bazaar in Istanbul. I ended up bringing home a kilo of Turkish nutmeg. I love eggnog during the holidays and all, but how exactly does one person use up an entire kilo of nutmeg?
Plants with Benefits gave me the answer. It seems that nutmeg has a long and ancient history in the Middle East, India, and China as an aphrodisiac for women. In India, it’s used as a stimulant in raising body temperature and sweetening breath. It can also have narcotic effects. Seems like a good combination to me! I think my wife, Judy, could use a hot toddy right now. Just a little more nutmeg, sweetie………there.
Of course, Grumpy has been popular with the ladies ever since his bachelor days. But until I read this book, I never realized one of the many reasons why. I love snacking on almonds! Truly, I am nuts about them. Therefore, it comes as no surprise that almonds have been used as libido lifters ever since the days of Samson and Delilah.
How do they work? Almonds are rich in Vitamins, minerals, and fatty acids that facilitate arousal. So if you’re feeling lonely tonight, I suggest you correct the situation with a little almond joy. Just make sure there are no scissors in the house.
More Good Stuff
Love is not the only thing on the menu here. Helen also provides advice on how to grow these randy plants plus delicious recipes that make use of them.
Published by St. Lynn’s Press, Plants with Benefits is available from amazon.com. Need I remind you that Valentine’s Day is coming up?
I’m locking my kilo of nutmeg in a safe.